Oh no this is not a negative post about 4C hair. The goal is for this to be helpful in setting some realistic expectations for your hair so you can overcome the hurdle of complicatedness and get to loving what God gave you. It’s all about embracing, baby.

1. Wash n’ Go’s = wash & no’s
Yeah girl but no. Wash and go’s are problematic because they lead to tangling and single strand knots but realistically since we don’t have a natural curl to define, a wash & go for us just ain’t the same. Once you get some hang time, you might be able to achieve this but since we have such a need for moisture wash ‘n goes just won’t be that easy.

2. Permanent Color
Again, moisturizing your hair in it’s natural state is work, adding permanent color further dries out your hair. That’s the last thing you want to do. I get wanting to switch up your style and express yourself, so this is not to stay that you can not color your hair fuchsia purple burgundy. Just be prepared for the task at hand.

3. Hairstyles that last all week (non-protective)
We keep talking about moisture right. Yeah that moisture thang says no ma’am this isn’t really realistic either. And I’m speaking towards hairstyles that you don’t have do a thing to for 5 days – no resetting at all. If ya find one let me know. But because your hair will need to be remoisturized and that will lead to a lost of definition, you’re going to have to reset your hair around the third or fourth day mark. You can get curls or definition to last but that dryness will definitely sneak up on you and that’s damaging to your hair.

4. Applying heat frequently.
Heat damage ain’t cute on anyone. I know stretched out/blown out looks can be tempting but there are other ways to achieve that look without the heat. Try your hand at stretching out your hair without heat. You can start by letting your hair air dry before you style it.

No go EMBRCE your hair!!

Published by BlackHairKitchen

BlackHairKitchen covers all things Black hair care, from the kitchen sink to the hair salon.

Join the Conversation


  1. Very true. Embracing our hair type and learning what great things we can do is the key. So many naturals love how thick my hair is. I’m learning more n more to make it do what it do!

  2. Hello Jouelzy,

    Just wanted you to know that I admire and appreciate your honest approach about your hair type. My hair is very similar to yours and I have learned that we actually do the same techniques on our hair…i.e. perm rod anyone ? 🙂 Anyway, I have been allowing my hair to air dry and I have not applied any heat to my hair in nearly 6 months. So…needless to say, I value your commentary and videos on this hair type and you are a vital source for those of us who learning to love and treasure this beautiful and unique natural hair texture.

  3. everything you have listed is TRUE, a true 4C;I’m glad you said EMBRACE the SHRINKAGE because a lot of 4C ladies hate shrinkage and I think that is so sad

  4. Everything you have said is so true. I dyed my hair and now I hate I did. It is dry. I’m still trying to learn how to stretch my hair because. The shrinkage is crazy. I live in AZ so salon with natural hair advice is limited. Thanks for the advice, will definitely use it.

  5. Love your videos, just discovered you about a month ago, really look forward to what you have to say, because yes, I have think coarse hair it does have a hair pattern, and I think the majority of it is 4c and the back is probably 4b. My biggest problem with it is I get split ends, even though I don’t use heat and I am now not even combing it, I finger detangle instead. I cut about 2 – 3 inches off it last November and it’s growing back but I really miss the length that it was at, especially the front. Anyway, what I love about you is that you are putting it across well that women with 4c hair have a very different hair journey. We face different obstacles and have a lot more working out to do and I’m really pleased that you are there to help us all with 4c hair find a few more solutions. Thank you.

  6. Hey Jouelzy! Omg! I am so glad to find someone, on Youtube, that I can relate to about my hair. I have been natural since November 2010(last relaxer). Over that 2 years and some months span, I researched about natural hair products and the process of growing my hair to an Afro. I have been obsessed with Afros and I consistently use natural hair products to assist in growing it out. In addition, I consistently exercise, eat right, take biotin and multivitamins for my hair to grow. However, my hair wasn’t grow fast in comparison to other Black women’s hair I seen on Youtube or in my life. A few days ago, I was scrolling on Youtube looking at HairCrush videos(I believe you heard of her). When I seen your video titled “Realistic Expectations of 4C Hair”on the side, I decided to check you out. Wow! When you talked about how 4C hair needs a lot of moisture and the do’s and don’ts for 4C hair, that is when I discovered that I had that type of hair! Your videos answered my questions about what type of hair I have and why it doesn’t curl like other Black women’s hair I seen! Now that I discovered you, I have been checking you out a lot. I have to say, continue to post more videos about 4C natural hairstyles! Like you said in one of your videos, ” I couldn’t find anyone on Youtube that has the same type of hair as me.” Well, I can’t say that because I found that person! Thanks!

  7. What you said it is so true. I have a mixture of 4b and 4c hair, which gets dry very quickly and I have coloured my hair, but I deep condition with every wash and what I did, I only coloured the front and middle. Plus I have also been using the GHE method for my hair.

    My styles last me for 4 days and I have to style again for another three days until I wash my hair.

  8. I am trying to learn to love 4C hair. I need a lot of help and encouragement after I was deluded into thinking everyone can “go natural” and do the same thing. I immediately related to all you have said about 4C hair and am now feeling a little bit relieved that I am not alone. I just kept telling everyone that my hair is nappy and just won’t grow but I really hope now that if I follow your advice that things will change. Thanks for keeping it real!

  9. Sometimes I feel really defeated being a 4 c. For a while before breakage and the big chop my hair was a better grade in my 20’s and early 30’s. this was my hair texture from before age 2 until i turned 19 and i got so much harsh comments then and 20 years later im still not sure. it w easier having a relaxer alhough i know its no good

  10. I love your post! And MOST of this is true except for the wash-and-no. I have very course 4c hair, and my curls are truly beautiful and defined. Definitely when i wash it, so the wash-and-go, is not always discouraging.

  11. Finally, Someone who really understands our hurr! I thought it was me, I have been rocking protective flat twists for four years and this year decided to start trying to style my hair myself. EVERYDAY is a new adventure, I am in Florida so when I do get a good style it either rains or gets muggy outside and Poof, there goes my style. Really appreciate your honesty here, everything you said is true.

  12. Personally, I LOVE the way that 4C hair looks after a wash and go. I’m one of the rare people that’s never been a fan of twist-outs, bantu knot-outs, and all those sorts of things. I also think that if you carefully detangle under water without using shampoo, you can avoid tangles. It’s worked for me and I’ve heard about others who have successfully managed it as well. It just takes patience. But anyway, fabulous post! I LOVE 4C hair and I’m so glad that I went natural! #4cpride 🙂

  13. Expecting 1 to attract different men of different races once you go natura. I think i assumed this would happen because of the storires i read but i attrac the same men No difference.

    Expectation 2 is thinking my hair would be stronger now that im natural umm no its same strength as it was relaxed just that it’s thicker.

    Expecting my hair to have curl once it went natural. Somebody was lying lol you can’t define 4c unless you manipulate it im fine with that

  14. YES to #3. I have to do my hair every 3-4 days, its gets so dry and stiff, I can barely move it. Thank you for verifying these. I remember when I first went natural, nothing ever went right – wash and gos, 5 day twist outs (yeah right). Now I know better.

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